#1 Fashion (Things I have noted about Spain)

The night before my flight to Spain I invited my friend Mekkena over to help me pack. Needless to say, I fall short in the area of most domestic tasks. Sure, I can do them and some things have actually grown on me like cooking and re-arranging furniture but some things still faze me, like packing a suitcase for six weeks of travel. Mekkena is one of those people that never ceases to amaze me with what she can do domestically. You need 16 dozen vegan cupcakes for a wedding shower? Or maybe you are looking for someone to hand sew you some persian drapes for your living room picture window? Or maybe you want to re-stain your grandpa´s vintage dresser from before the Great War…..call Mekkena.

My intentions were that together we would pack my suitcase, but as it turned out I ended up sitting on my ass drinking a beer and pointing to indicate if said object was going with me or not. I tried to help, but even my mother insisted that I stay out of it as much as possible.

¨Look at how nicely Mekkena folds your shirts¨, she said mournfully.

¨Whatever, I fold my shirts just fine¨, I snapped and took a swig of my beer.

¨You have a lot of pants¨, Mekkena interjected ¨How about we reduce it to three pair and some shorts¨.

¨You´re the expert¨, I said half bitterly.

¨Which ones do you want to take¨?

I pointed my beer towards a pair of straight leg khaki´s and then towards a pair of straight jeans and then to a pair of bootcuts that I thought might look cute with my nikes.

¨I can´t let you take these¨, Mekkena stopped me when I got to the bootcut.

¨Why, what´s wrong with them?¨, I inquired.

¨Nobody in Europe wears these, they´re not in fashion. Here´s another pair of straight legs why don´t we pack these instead?¨

Besides slightly deflating my ego, that was my first lesson in European culture versus what´s acceptable in the United States. So eager was I not to look like a foriegner once I set foot on Spanish terrain; more so to look European and not American, that my first purchase was a pair of BRIGHT orange skinny jeans, which do wonders for my behind by the way. I feel very at home when I wear them here, seeing as every other girl has on a pair of some sort of exotic color. The style here is distinct, it´s hard to put my finger on it exactly, but I like it. It is also much cheaper to buy clothing here, and quality clothing may I add, than it is in the US. Those jeans I bought were only ten euro, which is like $13.50 in USD. I can´t say that in every country it is this cheap, but in Spain it is. So if you ever get the opportunity to come here, be prepared to shop.

The Practice of Love

To love anything is a risk. It is a risk because to love requires not only emotional sentiment to be contrived in us, but it takes conscious decision to be vulnerable and take action for the well-being of the other.  The fact that this may not be requited, or even accepted, or appreciated is incredibly risky mostly because it already takes great strength for us imperfect people to try and do something that may not benefit us directly anyway.  For it to be love, it has to be about the beloved; and I don’t just mean this in a romantic sense, I mean whatever or whoever it is that we love.

The concern for one’s health is valid when it comes to loving. Often times we sense danger especially when we want to be sure of our own motives and the motives of others when it has to do with our hearts and that is a good thing to be assessed. However, to truly love someone we do have to realize that there will always be a risk of emotional pain, whether or not it is caused intentionally. Often I have noticed a sense of pain derived merely from the fact that I love someone.  They are away from me and I miss them, the vulnerability of opening up to them seems incredibly scary or letting them open up to me, what if we grow apart or they die? What if one of us becomes dependent on the other and things get unhealthy or uncomfortable? What if I blow this? Why love at all?

I think when it comes to loving we must surrender all things to God and learn from Him how to love the people in our lives.  He is as expansive as the relationships we have, and as complex as they might feel to us.  It is wise to remember that all people belong to him, and that ultimately any love we have to start with is a gift, and learning how to love well takes practice. The risk factor never goes away, and it won’t in this age. It is good to know that God’s love is also wise, and I don’t think he’d ask us to be unwise necessarily, but that he’d ask us to be kind, forgiving, and gracious people at all costs. Love constitutes more action than it does necessarily a bunch of extravagant emotions poured out over someone.  Love should make us mindful, thoughtful, and empathetic towards people.

I also believe a strong prayer life will help us keep a clear perception on our relationships. We will be more likely to remember that the most loving thing we can do is lift people up to God, to plead for their needs, to make a case for their situations, and to pray for them to experience more of the love that comes from God, the only kind that will bring complete wholeness.  This must be the core of our endeavors to love others. In some ways this will help to alleviate the risk of dependence, jealousy, manipulation, and dis-respect, which can often creep into our emotions when we love someone but it becomes more about us wanting to be loved/or see them do what we want them to do.  However, inviting God to be a part of our relationships also runs the risk of us not being in control to the degree we feel in control when we think of “our relationships”.  It is no longer imperative that so and so reciprocates everything I do for him/her, it means I must free them up in a sense to find their completeness in God and somehow trust that that doesn’t discredit my worth to them, it also means that I do not/ cannot try and force them to become something/ do something that hasn’t been realized yet in the heart; or by way of love.

In some ways, the whole bit of loving someone else becomes more complex when we realize that it isn’t centered on us; and simultaneously becomes much lighter and makes more sense when we recognize that love didn’t start with us, it started with God, and we are rather invited to partake of such a lovely gift.

Like Children

Something has been on my heart very much this past week, and it has been something I have wanted to write about for some time now and it just kept getting pushed to the back burner because of life, school, work, etc.  I’ve really wanted to delve into a particular scene from the book of Matthew, chapter 18, where Jesus is having a discussion with his disciples after an insightful question is posed to him. Jesus spent much of his time talking about the “kingdom of heaven” when teaching in public settings, and it becomes quite clear that most of his hearers do not hold the same understanding of the term. The Jewish listeners of his day naturally thought he meant a literal kingdom would come and uproot them from under Roman oppression and restore Israel as an autonomous nation, led by God’s chosen Messiah.  Jesus however, seemed to be referring to something much different and continued to speak openly about this new kingdom at hand.

With that historical context in mind, a question is posed by his eager disciples; who also have a similar cultural view of what Jesus is perhaps talking about. Here it is……

At about the same time the disciples came to Jesus asking “Who gets the highest rank in God’s kingdom”? For an answer Jesus called over a child, whom he stood in the middle of the room and said, “I’m telling you once and for all, that unless you return to square one and start over like children, you’re not even going to get a look at God’s kingdom let alone get in. Whoever becomes simple and elemental again, like this child, will rank high in God’s kingdom. What’s more, when you receive the childlike on my account, it’s the same as receiving me. (Matthew 18:1-5) (Italics mine)

The first thing I want to point out is the utter significance of the analogy. Children, during that time period and for many centuries afterward, were regarded as very unimportant on the societal scale. I’m not saying there weren’t good parents or people who loved children, but society as a whole did not consider them of value judging by common attitudes towards the young, and the utter lack of government provision or regard for their welfare. For instance, there was no assistance for those orphaned or unwanted by their families (possibly for mental or physical health reasons) and pointing to a particular incidence in which King Herod; who reigned over Israel during the birth of Christ and ordered that all baby boys under the age of two be executed by the nation’s own army, is telling.  The only command or law that explicitly states to make provisions for children who are in desperate situations is found in the Jewish Religious Law, and therefore given as a command to those who would consider themselves religious; but we will find that even there much is left to be desired.

Now, I think it’s safe to say that most of us think we get what Jesus was trying to convey when he used a child as an example for what it means to truly be a part of this “Kingdom”. Shoot it seems easy enough in our day with all the talk going around about the meaning of the “Kingdom of God”. Many of us think if we have God’s “favor”and if our ministry is super “anointed” or if we are financially blessed then God must be happy with us. But lest any of us think we are so wise; including myself, let us be reminded of what it truly means to be childlike, and why Jesus would probably still have to use this example in our times.

Jesus was undoubtedly, making a huge contrast. By pulling a child to the middle of the room; that was probably filled with not only his own disciples but probably religious scholars and teachers of the law who had come to hear him preach, we can be assured that he was deliberately trying to challenge people’s pre-conceived notions of righteousness and belonging.

Let us ask the question, what are children like?

The first thing that comes to my mind is chubby cheeks, smeared with anything that was probably supposed to be consumed but somehow ended up “on” the child. I think of goofy laughter and lots of questions and a natural friendliness and optimism. I think of an unquenchable curiosity and a wonderful vulnerability that shows love without hesitation and openly admits to needing love.  Healthy children behave like this.

I’m not trying to make anyone think they need to behave a certain way in order to somehow land on God’s “it” list, but I just find this to be such a cool and freeing concept to meditate on. There is way too much here for me to even cover in just one blog, but it does inspire the wheels to turn in my head.

If this being childlike is what it truly means by definition to be a part of God’s kingdom, do our lives actually reflect this? Jesus is pretty clear that we will not even be able to conceive it; or see it, if we don’t somehow become like children again.

For me personally, I see this as an invitation, as are most things when dealing with God. It is an invitation to become unburdened with the “adult” pressures and concerns that can literally eat us alive from the inside out and make us into hardened and bitter people. I have experienced this, we all have. There are times when we find that haven’t stopped in days, weeks, months and just rested from school, work, assignments, meetings, relationships, duties etc…etc.. I have very little patience, very little left to give, very little compassion in my heart if I do not stop and pull back from all that is going on around me, the whirlwind.

Another thing, by the time we are adults we all have plenty of experiences and schemas that have helped form our identities and ways in which we process and view the world. Surely, some of these experiences have been very helpful and wonderful but I can imagine that we all have had some that have been unhealthy and harmful to say the least.  Our hearts get hurt, we adopt negative self-images, we lose the ability to trust, we become jaded and tired and maybe the most damaging of all, we stop dreaming and believing that we have a purpose.

That is one thing about children, they dream without reservation, they adopt great identities and feel no shame about it. The world is a wonder to them. What a sad day it is when we can no longer feel wonder. I’m serious.  That is a sad day.

I think it would be inappropriate for me to try and explain how to become like a child, because well…..that process is going to look different for everybody; and I myself am learning, but here is something to consider, Jesus is literally saying that the highest badge of spirituality/God’s pleasure with your life IS your ability to relate to him and life around you as with the heart of a child.  It is then that you will be able to be truly thankful, it is then that you will be free to trust, it is then that you will be free to give love and receive it, and it is then dreams and aspirations will catch your heart, and if you are already finding yourself close to these things, God’s kingdom isn’t very far. 

Touching God

I would like to take some time and write about an experience I had in prayer, way back during the summer between 7^th and 8^th grade; a harrowing time for many including myself. How would I describe me during that part of my life? I was mostly self-hating, confused and depressed; and for many reasons. I had a lot of turmoil going on over at my dad’s house that made me feel trapped (see other posts for more detail) and I had already had to adjust to two different school districts in my short life, and although I had already met some people who would remain my best friends throughout my life, I felt disconnected from my peers.

Mainly, my issue was that I could not perceive any self-worth. I was horribly insecure and awkward with my own body but had no way to articulate what I was feeling to anybody, because I didn’t know what I was feeling.  It was literally beyond my means to form a positive thought about myself. I also didn’t realize that pretty much every one else felt somewhat like this to whatever degree because let’s face it, middle school sucks!

I think this was the only time I was near to be being possibly clinically depressed. I would cry all the time and I became quite the angry journalist. Once I even told my mom I probably needed medication; and she was willing to do whatever was needed to help me; of course. She had noticed a change in my behavior, but alas, I felt inadequate trying to describe my feelings, and I hid from her much of what was going on at my dad’s house; which now that I am older, contributed to a lot of my negative self-image.

There was one day in particular that I was feeling especially shitty about life and alone, and I was pretty sure even God was tired of hearing me cry. So I decided to do the only thing I could think of to calm myself down, go for a walk. I left the house in a blur of tears and began walking with no destination in sight. My feet lead me to the park by my old elementary school where I ended up plopping myself down on top of the cool new play structure that wasn’t there when I went to school, and crying commenced. I cried until I could cry no more, and eventually I just sat there wanting to talk to God, but I was wrestling inside.

I was wrestling with the fact that whatever was going to come out of my mouth would not be pretty. I was angry, and I was tired. I was tired of hating myself and tired of feeling trapped into hating myself, like I said I felt like I literally was unable to make those feelings go away. Finally, I realized I was either going to continue to sit there, or express myself in whatever way I could to the one person who said he was with me no matter what.

“Shit”!!!!! I yelled “God, I am sooo tired of hating myself”! Another episode of tears ensued but since I had started talking I couldn’t stop, something was releasing. ( yes, I swore in conversation with God, I don’t think he particularly minded)

“I don’t know why I feel this way, and I don’t want to hate myself anymore, I am so tired of this”. I laid myself out on my stomach and turned my palms upward. To this day I have no idea why I took that position, I was raised catholic and we never did anything outwardly expressive in prayer except kneel at mass.

As I did this however, I felt something.  I continued to cry and repeat the same phrase over and over to God, and as I lay there, I felt like someone was laying over me. I know that sounds like a bunch of spiritual whoopla, but I am not making this up.  I had talked to God many, many times before that; call it prayer if you will, but I had never felt anything like this before.

An inner warmth began to envelop me, it started from my chest and began to radiate all through my body, until I had stopped crying and just listened.

There was no audible voice of God, the heavens didn’t open up with trumpets and angels singing the hallelujah chorus, but I was deeply aware that God was there, and that he knew.

He knew all about what I was feeling and how badly I was entrenched in self- hatred, and he wasn’t slapping his palm on his forehead annoyed at my disposition.

In fact, I know this had to be God because for absolutely no reason, I began to feel like I was loved. It hit me after I had been sitting there in silence for about ten minutes realizing God’s presence.

I remember being so alarmed that I think I blurted out “what is this?”

It was an external idea/presence that had broken through the hardness of my pain and lodged itself inside me. It’s difficult to try and describe such experiences because they had little to do with anything material or concrete. It was my own subjective experience with the divine, and it totally changed me.

I picked myself up from laying on the top platform of the playground structure and stood up, tears streaming down my face, but this time they were tears of joy. (I know, I cry a lot)

I felt for the first time, ever, maybe, that I was loved, that God loved me, and that perhaps people did too and that life could be beautiful.

I felt like I had overcome something too, my own inability to let myself out of the cage. Then I remember feeling like I wanted to run. There was a forest off to the side of the playground and I couldn’t think of anything more delightful than running through a forest at that moment. So I did.

That was the beginning of many new things in my life, new ways of thinking, new ways of loving, and it was the day I really fell in love with God. There’s no other way to put it.

Why that day? Why in that way? I have no idea, and I don’t think everyone experiences God exactly like that and of course they wouldn’t! What got through to me is not what would get through to some other folk. Everyone is different and only God knows how to meet each of us in the unique way that we were designed to be reached.

What I do know about God is that he does not kick us when we are down; even if we are half our own problem at times, and that often those are the times when we are most willing to even give him some sort of consideration; which I have found he will capitalize on if we really want to know him.

More than a Science Lesson: Galileo Galilei

The life of Galileo Galilei is one of the most beautiful and tragic examples of a man caught between two worlds. His life has become an anecdote for the person who finds themselves wrestling with questions about reality, truth, and the whirlwind of internal and external consequences that arise when our belief systems are challenged. I don’t think the correct conclusion is to assume that one option(being scientific fact) displaces the other option (faith and ideology) or vise versa, but the lesson learned here lies much deeper. For me, I find the whole controversy between Galileo’s study of the cosmos and the orthodox teachings of the Catholic Church fascinating, and telling, and relevant to our daily lives.

Galileo was born in 1564, during a time in which tensions already existed. The teachings of the Catholic Church were being questioned by those who were unsettled with its dogma, such as Martin Luther; whose Doctrine of Two Kingdoms marked the beginning of the separation of Church and State. It was not only the threat of losing political power that the church feared, but reform and loss of prestige as a spiritual governing authority. The protestant reform was already threatening the idea of “Divine Right” that God appointed Kings and Rulers based on lineage; and that power could only be passed only to those elect individuals. The order of “Divine Right”also meant that a King or ruler was still subject to the influence and approval of the Church. Upward or downward mobility was practically non-existent amongst social classes in general, as they were also seen as pre-destined by God.

When it came to social change, scientific and mathematical observations, it seemed that any new ideas could be a possible heretical attempt to compromise the authority of the church’s teaching. Galileo; an Italian physicist, astronomer and mathematician, was a supporter of Copernicus’  heliocentric theory that the Sun was the center of the Universe, not the earth; which was the accepted belief based on Aristotle’s theory of geocentrism. The Church backed this belief as it seemed to prove scriptural. Certain scriptures like  Psalm 93:1, 96:10 and 1 Chronicles talk about the earth being firmly positioned, and cannot be moved; which would seem to fit the idea of the earth being established as the unmovable center of the Universe. Ecclesiastes 1:5 says “the sun rises and sets and returns to its place” which seems to fit with the idea that the sun revolves around the earth. The church instructed that the Earth’s location as the center of the Universe had to do with humanity’s centrality to the plan of God. These two ideas were inseparable. The idea of the earth being one of five other planets (known at the time) revolving on their axis around the Sun, really screwed with people’s theology.

Galileo’s telescope allowed him to view the cosmos and confirm that in fact, Copernicus theory of the Universe was indeed, correct. The earth revolved around the sun. What is interesting is that Galileo did not personally see this as a contradiction to his faith; as he was a Catholic, but rather that the scriptures being used to ground geocentrism were mis-interpreted. God in his infinite wisdom, was not confined to creating within our understanding, but His. Minds like Johannes Kepler; a contemporary of Galileo, felt the same way. To them, discovery of the natural world was a key to understanding its creator. Besides that, the psalmist of the Old Testament were limited in their ability to understand the Universe and would have had to describe creation as they were able to conceive it from a terrestrial point of view. The real problem lies in the fact that the Church had based their theological understanding on a theory           ( Aristotle’s and Ptolemy’s) and any scientific advances that proved that theory false, meant that the Church was wrong; which just wasn’t happening.

Things took a turn for worse when a respectful admirer and friend of Galileo, Pope Urban VIII began to fear for his life, as the pressure to expose and eradicate heresy swept through Europe. Galileo’s enemies accused Urban of being soft on defending the church, so he reacted out of fear and anger. In Galileo’s book “Dialogue concerning the Two World Systems” he presents fictional characters presenting the conflicting ideas of Heliocentrism and Geocentrism. The character advocating Geocentrism was named humorously enough, Simplicius. Galileo made the mistake of placing verbatim and recognizable words from the Pope’s mouth into Simplicius’. He was therefore, tried by the Inquisition and found guilty on three accounts of heresy. Galileo was forced to renounce all of his precious work and placed under house arrest for the rest of his life; a lighter sentence given the track record of the Inquisition. Many others were burned at the stake or tortured into renouncing their work.

The funny thing is, all of us today learn about the Universe according to Galileo’s research and Copernicus’ heliocentric theory, which is no longer a theory but an accepted truth about the natural world, taught in both private and public schools. Christians today do not feel compromised about their faith due to the fact that the earth is not the center of the Universe, either. A lot has changed, and today the Church ( both the Catholic church and the Protestant secs; I see them as one in intention) have gone through layers of reformation to undo the deep-seated corruption that began almost as soon as Jesus ascended back into heaven; although it seems to be a slow process I must admit.

I have to wonder about the emotional turmoil of one man, wired brilliantly to pursue God through His creation, created to learn and discover, designed to experience the uncreated through the created and yet  oppressed and rejected by the ones who should have embraced him, accepted him, at least tried to understand him and what he was saying; even if he ended up being wrong. When I consider the manner in which Jesus himself lived, taking no offense to even those who spit on him, whipped him, and hung him on a cross, I have to wonder why we get so offended at a mere challenge? What is more, it is apparent that Galileo was not trying to disprove God, but to better understand how the Universe works. This whole thing does not come down to Galileo vs. the Bible or verses God, it was Galileo versus the Church, the minds of men, which are fallible.

Why is this applicable to us today? I know that as a Christian I am constantly learning about what it means to love and serve God with my life, and there have been times that I have been wrong about what I thought a scripture meant or what I thought God’s will was.  I truly believe that the Bible is reliable in its presentation of God’s nature, his relationship to humanity, and what he desires for humanity, but that doesn’t mean I think I know everything there is to know about God or that I have a perfect understanding of his will. None of us do. The whole idea of a relationship with Him is that as we seek Him and search Him out, we begin to see more and more who He is. The scriptures speak of this mystery

 ^{Proverbs 25: 2} It is the glory of God to conceal a matter;
to search out a matter is the glory of kings.

Or in a modern translation of the same exact verse

^{Proverbs 25:2} God delights in concealing things;
scientists delight in discovering things.

So, in God’s mind scientists are comparable to kings. To discover who He is and what He’s all about is just as much a natural phenomenon as it is a spiritual one. We were created for it, humans love to know the right answer. I spent most of my life believing that Pluto was a planet, and now I am told it’s not. Most of the time we fall short of the whole picture as much as we love to know things for certain. The truth is we will all be wrong at times, and it’s okay, as long as we are willing to learn from it. The Bible has been used by so many men to prove their own ideas, but the most important ideas expressed in the Bible are summed up in these two verses according to Jesus

Mark 12:30-31

The Message (MSG)

^29-31Jesus said, “The first in importance is, ‘Listen, Israel: The Lord your God is one; so love the Lord God with all your passion and prayer and intelligence and energy.’ And here is the second: ‘Love others as well as you love yourself.’ There is no other commandment that ranks with these.”

Let’s ask ourselves everyday, are we really doing this?

Uncovering Misconceptions of Faith: Women in Ministry

.

To start, I love the writings of Paul. Once a former scholar of the Jewish Laws, Paul is dead set on annihilating and torturing any Christian he can get his hands on. He is on his own personal genocide when he has a vision of Christ that transforms his life. Paul is temporarily blinded by this vision until he is divinely led to the home of a non-Jew ( which would be an utter disgrace for a devout Jew at that time) and baptized at the hands of gentile(non-jew) whereupon he is able to see again. Talk about humbling. Paul explains this encounter

For a time I thought it was my duty to oppose this Jesus of Nazareth with all my might. Backed with the full authority of the high priests, I threw these believers—I had no idea they were God’s people!—into the Jerusalem jail right and left, and whenever it came to a vote, I voted for their execution. I stormed through their meeting places, bullying them into cursing Jesus, a one-man terror obsessed with obliterating these people. And then I started on the towns outside Jerusalem.

 ^12-14“One day on my way to Damascus, armed as always with papers from the high priests authorizing my action, right in the middle of the day a blaze of light, light outshining the sun, poured out of the sky on me and my companions. Oh, King, it was so bright! We fell flat on our faces. Then I heard a voice in Hebrew: ‘Saul, Saul, why are you out to get me? Why do you insist on going against the grain?’

 ^15-16“I said, ‘Who are you, Master?’

   “The voice answered, ‘I am Jesus, the One you’re hunting down like an animal. But now, up on your feet—I have a job for you. I’ve handpicked you to be a servant and witness to what’s happened today, and to what I am going to show you.

 ^17-18“‘I’m sending you off to open the eyes of the outsiders so they can see the difference between dark and light, and choose light, see the difference between Satan and God, and choose God. I’m sending you off to present my offer of sins forgiven, and a place in the family, inviting them into the company of those who begin real living by believing in me.’ (Acts 26)

So, Paul is now sent to love and give his life for the very people he wanted to kill. In the process, he is thrown in jail countless times, beaten, shipwrecked, starved, wearied from traveling and persecuted. Yet, he is the main reason any non-jews today have heard about Jesus. Most of the actual disciples of Christ focused on ministering to Jews, but Paul had a special calling for those outside the Jewish faith. This was a major turning point in the understanding that superficial identities lose their potency in faith in Christ. Paul did much of the grunt work in trying to break down the external barriers that kept Jews and gentiles separated by culture and class structures. He preached that inside Christ those things didn’t matter any longer. Much of his writing is based on helping resolve disputes that arose due to this new integration.

Like Jesus, Paul also allowed women to participate in very significant ways in his ministry, which was unheard of in that time. Both Jesus and Paul defied the common rabbinic attitudes that excluded women and avoided them almost entirely. It was actually common practice of pharisees and teachers of the law to use negative examples of women to teach moral lessons, Jesus never did this but treated both men and women with the same dignity and love. Paul often opens his letters praising women in his ministry for their efforts, service to God, and character. In the majority of Paul’s teaching on life in Christ, he makes no impartiality between gender on any issues. The benefits of Christ, the gifts that he gives, the call to be ministers of the gospel is not distinct to race, gender or social class.

Yet, oddly enough we are thrown a curve ball by a few statements Paul makes regarding a woman’s “place”. These statements have had huge effects on church doctrine, people’s attitudes toward women in the church regarding positions of authority, and have caused much personal angst in individual’s struggle to understand what exactly Paul, or rather, God feels about them. Much more today than thirty years ago we find women going to seminary to become pastors or leaders in their church. Some of this I feel we owe to the secular women’s rights movement, which is changing culture and therefore, creating new need in the church for the same. The interesting thing to me about this is that a man never has to doubt if the call on his life to lead a church or ministry is biblical and would make God happy, but a woman with the same desire; to serve Jesus, must at some point face either her own wondering about these verses, or other’s opinions.

My question is do we need even wonder at all? I have often had a hard time with Paul’s statements regarding women in the church because at face value they almost seem to echo the Victorian ideals that a woman should be kept out of the public, quiet, and unquestionably subdued to her husband’s authority. Is Paul who seems to contradict the majority of his own teaching with these few statements actually saying what we think he’s been saying. or is this an interpretation misunderstanding. I think it is very important to realize that the way we read scripture nowadays is quite different than how it was read and percieved in the time it was written. We have an entire letter, chopped up and sectioned off into chapters and verses that were meant to make it easier to find our way around in the bible. These breaks and chapters were the invention of those that translated and compiled these books into the bible, not the original authors. So, as you can imagine, a verse taken from it’s context can have a completely different meaning, and I will give examples.

Here is one of the most seemingly blatant verses that depicts Paul’s attitude on what a women’s place is in church and in life.

³⁴ The women are to ^(BF)keep silent in the churches; for they are not permitted to speak, but ^(BG)are to subject themselves, just as ^(BH)the Law also says. ³⁵ If they desire to learn anything, let them ask their own husbands at home; for it is^[n]improper for a woman to speak in church. ^36 [o]Was it from you that the word of God first went forth? Or has it come to you only? 

                              

Okay, calm down. This verse seems to say that Paul feels a woman should “sit down and shut up” and be withdrawn from participation. However, I will now place the verses back in the surrounding context without the breakages, as it was read by the original readers.

So here’s what I want you to do. When you gather for worship, each one of you be prepared with something that will be useful for all: Sing a hymn, teach a lesson, tell a story, lead a prayer, provide an insight. If prayers are offered in tongues, two or three’s the limit, and then only if someone is present who can interpret what you’re saying. Otherwise, keep it between God and yourself. And no more than two or three speakers at a meeting, with the rest of you listening and taking it to heart. Take your turn, no one person taking over. Then each speaker gets a chance to say something special from God, and you all learn from each other. If you choose to speak, you’re also responsible for how and when you speak. When we worship the right way, God doesn’t stir us up into confusion; he brings us into harmony. This goes for all the churches—no exceptions. Wives must not disrupt worship, talking when they should be listening, asking questions that could more appropriately be asked of their husbands at home. God’s Book of the law guides our manners and customs here. Wives have no license to use the time of worship for unwarranted speaking. Do you—both women and men—imagine that you’re a sacred oracle determining what’s right and wrong? Do you think everything revolves around you. If any one of you thinks God has something for you to say or has inspired you to do something, pay close attention to what I have written. This is the way the Master wants it. If you won’t play by these rules, God can’t use you. Sorry. 

Okay, within it’s context, it lools like Paul was writing to everybody about what it means to honor God when we come together to fellowship. He is addressing a problem it seems, that every time this Corinthian church gets together, it is complete chaos. As hinted from the text, people are talking over eachother, there is no sense of self-conduct or honoring God, and just about everyone is getting up to say something or get their two sense in. Paul is adament that this kind of self-serving behavior repels God’s presence rather than invites it. The specific message to women implies that there was possibly a good amount of women who were involved in inciting these disruptions. Historical context lends itself to this as well. The Corinthian church was largely made up of new converts who without a doubt worshipped in pagan temples prior. Men would worship in different temples than their wives, and wives from their husbands, just like the jews segregated men from women in the synagogue. The whole idea of men and women worshipping together was a brand new concept, and probably difficult for some to reconcile. Paul’s point is that to honor God, we must honor one another in these times of fellowhip, and respect whoever is appointed to lead the time.

To confirm this, look at another verse, that Paul writes earlier on men and women worshipping God together^–

¹²Don’t, by the way, read too much into the differences here between men and women. Neither man nor woman can go it alone or claim priority. Man was created first, as a beautiful shining reflection of God—that is true. But the head on a woman’s body clearly outshines in beauty the head of her “head,” her husband. The first woman came from man, true—but ever since then, every man comes from a woman! And since virtually everything comes from God anyway, let’s quit going through these “who’s first” routines.

This seems to remove all doubt that Paul actually thinks one gender is more apt based on biological differences to honor God. The context of this verse is found in 1 Corintians 11, which talks about men and women honoring one another in marriage.

Also note:

1. “head” does NOT mean the same thing we mean by it in Western culture. From the standpoint of anatomical function, in Paul’s day it was the ‘heart’ that made the decisions, guided life, etc. “Head” was much more the ‘adornment department’ of the body! In other words, when people wanted to make decisions, they used their heart; when they wanted to get all “gussied up” [“dressed up”, for you colloquially-deprived readers ;>) ], they used theirhead (e.g. hair, makeup, jewelry). So, in the literature, the word translated ‘head’ here often shows up as ‘crown’ or ‘excellence’. [Hence, its usefulness in the passage of I Cor 11.]
2. The root notion was that of ‘source’, and from this usage it was applied to people–Zeus, Pharoah, the progenitors of the Twelve Tribes, Christ-with reference to the Church, man (Adam)–with reference to woman (Eve)….
3. If an author wanted to make a point about AUTHORITY, he would use two specific words–exousia (“authority”; Matt 28.18, Rom 13.1-3) and/orarchon (“ruler”; Rom 13.3). He only used ‘head’ when dealing with issues of origination, completion, consummation.                                                                                      (Christian thinktank.com)

        The other similarly used verse to deter women from becoming ordained ministers, is written by Paul to a young disciple who is overseeing a church. I Timothy 2.11-14:

A woman should learn in quietness and full submission. 12 I do not permit a woman to teach or to have authority over a man; she must be silent. 13 For Adam was formed first, then Eve. 14 And Adam was not the one deceived; it was the woman who was deceived and became a sinner.

I want to say a couple of things about this verse. First, I am going to put this verse back in context the same way I did with the prior one, as a complete thought process, and not a broken one.

Since prayer is at the bottom of all this, what I want mostly is for men to pray—not shaking angry fists at enemies but raising holy hands to God. And I want women to get in there with the men in humility before God, not primping before a mirror or chasing the latest fashions but doing something beautiful for God and becoming beautiful doing it. I don’t let women take over and tell the men what to do. They should study to be quiet and obedient along with everyone else. Adam was made first, then Eve; woman was deceived first—our pioneer in sin!—with Adam right on her heels. On the other hand, her childbearing brought about salvation, reversing Eve. But this salvation only comes to those who continue in faith, love, and holiness, gathering it all into maturity. You can depend on this.

The two verses are the same but different translations, the first, the NIV, and the second, the Message. I find the meaning to be clearer in the later, but I think there is something to be said for the wording in the first. The idea of a woman being “quiet” and learning in submissive style, is actually the style of rabbinic mentorship. Students of a rabbi, or spiritual teacher of the jewish faith, were always male, and expected to quietly and submissively learn from their teachers, the destination of a rabbi’s student would be to eventually become a rabbi, or “teacher”, himself. The message version makes this a bit more clear as it implies women studying with the same diligence as everyone else. The term “quiet” does not mean withdrawn and silent, like it does in modern english, but rather the taking on of the attribute of humility as a student; which is quality often associated with Jesus’ style of ministry, he himself being humble in nature.

The allusion to eve being the one to eat of the fruit first, is a call to remember this humility. The apostles always reference original sin to Adam, and the early church would have been familiar with this teaching. It is possible that finger-pointing began happening towards men for humanity’s error. Paul’s solo emphasis on eve’s part as the first to eat of the fruit, could in fact be, a gentle reminder that women has also fallen, and should be humble. This would certainly fit with Paul’s statement in Corinthians 11. In fact, by this time in history gnostic ( a pseudo christian group) teachings had arisen at that time that pointed to Adam as the first to be decieved, and that women was found unculpable. Paul may in fact be trying to correct theology and permit these “false teachers” from corrupting the church in ephesus.

The reference to child-bearing being Eve’s salvation does not mean that a woman’s redemption is literally through childbirth, and being an exceptional mother. This would be contrary to the gospel that men and women are only saved through the acceptance of Christ’s work of forgiveness and restoration to God. Paul is absolutely alluding to Jesus coming directly from Eve’s lineage as her own salvation.

Any use of that verse to keep women from serving God in ministry is hogwash. It is clear that Paul is giving Timothy instruction on how to handle a church full of people who are new to what it means to be accepted in to God’s family. Many of them are still hanging onto old thought patterns and practice from their lifestyles prior to knowing Jesus. The letters to Timothy are filled with warnings about false teachers and teachings.

Paul also praises the women in Timothy’s life for teaching him in the ways of the Lord. Why would Paul blatantly praise women for teaching the things of God, if he felt that to be only a man’s job. It must be that what Paul is refering to a specific group, in a specific time. How can Paul praise some women for teaching but then say that no women should ever teach or preach the gospel.

That precious memory triggers another: your honest faith—and what a rich faith it is, handed down from your grandmother Lois to your mother Eunice, and now to you! And the special gift of ministry you received when I laid hands on you and prayed—keep that ablaze! God doesn’t want us to be shy with his gifts, but bold and loving and sensible. ( 2 Timothy 1:5-7)

Thoughts on Family

I never really started to appreciate the idea of having blood family until I lost my aunt Rita to cancer back in January 1999. When you’re little, you know little else but the innate security that comes from having people in your life who are there, regardless if you want them there all the time or not. Family is not limited to those who are blood, of course. Some of us realize this at an early age when we begin to make strong connections with individuals that mirror what we desire our families to be. This may come about if our given families are distant, or emotionally disconnected, but more often than not, it is the joy of life to make friends that become as close to us as kin. However, there is something to be said for the ache that comes when relations that have seen us from diapers onward are suddenly and inexplicably, gone.

In the past decade I have lost all of my grandparents on both my mother’s and father’s side. This past year both my great-grandma and grandma passed a week apart from each other, for which I still grieve at odd hours it seems. The most difficult loss for me yet is the fact that I’ve been estranged from my father for about five years now due to an abusive marriage he is holding on to. As a result I have two underage sisters I cannot visit or have a relationship with any longer; mainly because my step-mother is a deeply broken person, and I’m afraid unaware of how her brokeness has affected others.

Forgive me if this sounds like a pity party, because it is not. I think for most of us loss is something that we all must face, loss of relationships. It is one of the most difficult aspects of life, I think because we realize how very little control we have in matters that we feel we should. It is for this reason that I have become so keen lately on trying to hold onto whatever blood relations I have left. Although most of my external family have moved away from the great mitten to warmer climates, I thank God for Facebook. I can keep up with them more frequently and feel a bit more connected through current photos, posts, and inbox messages.

So when I found out last week that my dad’s brother Don and his son, Aaron were flying in from Cali, I jumped on the opportunity to set up a date with them. I have probably only seen my uncle and cousin a handful of times in my life and mainly when I was very little, but the pervasive connection to my own father, and the fact that I can’t rely on others to maintain these connections for me any longer(ie being dragged to family functions) then I thought “dammit I’m gonna do it myself.” So I called up my Uncle who I haven’t seen in eleven years and expressed how excited I was that he and Aaron were coming to visit and that my mom (my only nuclear family) and I would be thrilled to see them.

We planned on getting together this past saturday, which was perfect, because I had already planned on visiting with my mother, and she hadn’t seen Donny and Aaron since my dad’s mother’s funeral back in the mid 90’s. So the date was set. I worked a nine-hour shift that morning and flew back to my apartment to shower and change, and then drove out to Livonia to my mom’s. I had called my uncle earlier and left a voicemail, but I hadn’t heard back at that point. We weren’t sure when we were meeting, and I had no idea how else to get ahold of him. I texted him around five and he responded that he had gone out with one of his friends for food in dearborn. On that note, my mom and I decided to go out for dinner and wait to see what their plans were for after. I got a response that he and Aaron would love to meet up for drinks later at the Box Bar in Plymouth. I had sort of forgot that Don and Aaron live in Cali and are both extremely extroverted, fun-loving, adventurous guys and like to stay up really late. Maybe, I never knew that at all, but by the time ten o’clock rolled around and I hadn’t heard from them about leaving Dearborn, I was ready to go to bed.

I had been up since 5 a.m. and I thought we would have met up with them a lot earlier. Then I get a text at 10:30, and they are ready to party. It was as if all my sleepiness wore off, the moment I had waited for, and been a texting creep for, was finally here. My mom and I drove to Plymouth and got to the Box around 10:45. We waited about ten minutes and got drinks at the bar before finally, in walks Donny and Aaron. Maybe this sounds retarded, but I felt so elated. This was my family, not my dad’s brother who I could only see for about an hour because my step-mom secretly resented him for being gay (she’d find any excuse to push my Dad’s family away from him). This was my Uncle and my cousin.

The next couple hours were awesome. We sat outside in the warm summer night and drank beers and asked questions like ” What do you do?” “Who are you?” My uncle Donny has a great job as security for a private company and owns a gorgeous house in San Diego. He is in fantastic shape and gets out quite a bit, he and Aaron have a great relationship. Aaron, who is a year older than me, just bought a condo down the street from his ol’ dad and is getting ready to go on a tour’ de South America with his girlfriend next month.

Honestly, it felt amazing to be reconnecting with my family, and to find out that they were such good people. Aaron is extremely philanthropic and is using his computer skills to launch a website for a non-profit in some poor country down in South America, I can’t remember which. He has done a lot of traveling thus far and cares deeply about people and world situations. I have rarely met a man like him, let alone in my own family.

As things like this go, it went by way too fast. I left feeling, however, inspired and encouraged by my family. I know the next step is going to visit them. I have another aunt in Cali, as well, and family in florida I am long overdue on seeing. I treasure the fact that my mom and I are so close, and I look forward to reclaiming some of my lost relationships. The ones that are gone permanently are only the ones who have left this world, that is the only finality. There is still hope and opportunity with those who are living, and even with murky situations like my dad and sisters, all I can do is pray and ask for a door to open. Family is so important, it is true, they help us realize who we are, and give us strength inways that others cannot.

Jesus is not a political flag.

There are a great many things I admire my mom for, and when I think about who she is, my heart wells up with love and almost this sense of weird sadness. I can’t really explain the weird sadness except that it stems from a place of deep gratitude to have been born to her, all that she’s sacrificed for me, and the way she raised me, and the fact that I can’t have her forever on this earth. It’s this mysterious maternal bond that evokes such emotion and connection between mothers and daughters, and my english language falls short of describing that kind of love.

This past mother’s day my mom and I were out shopping and talking in the car, and she mentioned that our relationship was such a blessing to her because there were a lot of things missing between her and her own mother. Now, I love my grandma make no mistake, but I’ve known that she and my mom never had the closeness or connection that my mom and I share as mother and daughter. My grandma actually said some pretty hurtful things to my mom and left some emotional scars in her soul that were pretty hard for her to forgive and reconcile.  That said, one of the things my mom shared with me that day about her decision to parent me in the way that she did, was that she would avoid using what she calls ” the stupid no”.

The stupid “no” is telling your child he or she cannot do something, or that something is wrong without telling them why or helping them see any logic in the forbidding. Some might argue that little kids can’t understand reason, or that they won’t heed a reasonable explanation for why not to do something, but I disagree 100%. When my mom had to tell me no, or put limits on something I was doing, which was rare anyway; we always dialogued about it, and I truly knew that she had my best interest in mind, so I rarely fought it. In fact, I had such a respect for her, if I did do something I knew she wouldn’t be happy about me doing if she were present, I would feel extremely guilty, and pained in my heart. This is because I knew where she was coming from, and that it would break her heart if something bad happened to me.

What I have just described here, I know is not that common between parents and children. I don’t really have a relationship with my dad, so I also get the feelings that accompany an absent parent. What is more uncommon than the relationship I have with my mom in comparison to other mother/daughter relationships, is experiencing these exact emotions with God; having this kind of relationship with the one who calls himself ” Our Father”.

When I read the bible, even if I am trying to study it for its historical/literary content, I am always blown away by the continual expression of love and relationship between God and man, and the eerie way that particular verses can break the dam of my unaware heart at any moment, and send me into deep contemplation or on my face weeping. I no longer pray with the goal of accomplishing an agenda, but rather for the privilege of being with God and having relationship with him. Whenever I sit down to pray, I begin by saying his name, and BAM, I can feel him, as if he had been waiting at bated breath for me to notice that he was already there anyway.

I do not for one minute believe I have this sort of relationship with God because I am special, not at all. God desires to have this with everyone he created, everyone. When I wrote about Donald Miller’s theory on the Lifeboat mentality people operate under, as if some enchantment had bewitched the entire world, I didn’t mean for it to seem as an eternal disposition. Rescue has come in the person of Christ, and true validation and love are restored in his person. Contrary to what many feel when they think about Jesus, following Him is less about keeping rules; in fact it’s not about that at all, and all about the bond between your heart and his, in exactly the same way my mom and I share our familial bond. 

This brings me to the question, what is this whole issue of morality being a political flag the mainstream Christian Church is waving these days? To break it down, it is like the ” stupid no” my mom refused to deal me when I was growing up, but it seems like that is what the church is dealing people who aren’t living up to its standards of morality. From my observation, those who deal it, are more concerned with a propositional gospel rather than a relational one.  The truth is that the bible is not a strict moral code, it does not address each and every issue giving a black and white, right or wrong. It gives enough to guide a man’s conscience, but it was not intended to be a rule book. It is made up of poetry, letters, historical events, and parables that are meant to reach into a man’s heart and invoke and invite a relationship with God.

I believe that God deeply cares about morality, but he never intended for it to be a means by which we earn favor with him. Morality cannot save anybody. It would be like my mom and I’s relationship being all about what I can and cannot do, and nothing else. In the same way I wanted to honor my mom by heeding her guidance because I loved her, and I know she loves me, that is where true morality stems from. It is what keeps a husband from cheating on his wife, a friend from stealing a friends goods, it holds us accountable for helping the poor, because relationships are affected by morality or the lack thereof. Have you ever noticed that all of the ten commandments are about relationships with others?

Morality as a means in and of itself is dead. Yet the church in many ways has turned it into a culture war in an us vs. them mentality. When Christians think about current morality issues, they are most likely to raise the topic of abortion and gay marriage. “However, moral ideas presented in the New Testament, by Jesus himself, include loving our neighbors, being unified in the bond of peace, loving our enemies, looking at ourselves before judge others, forgiveness, speaking the truth in love lest we sound like clanging cymbals, ( turn on fox news if you want to hear clanging cymbals).”  -Donald Miller-

Morality as a political battering ram against those who do not agree or live by the same precepts is not what Jesus would want, if it was, he would have hopped into the political arena  during his ministry, yet he did not. In fact, he avoided it at all costs. Just read the gospels and you will see this. Instead, he invested his time in people’s lives. He ate with prostitutes, befriended underhanded tax collectors, and kept company with thieves, people with issues and mess all around, and he treated them with love, respect, and shared the deep things of God with them, and you know what, they found life and went on to change the world.

Donald Miller is a Christian author, but by no means on a political, self-serving pedestal. He was a guest on a conservative radio show broadcasted on a secular station awhile back, and the dialogue between him and the interviewer says a lot about this whole issue.

” The interviewer asked what I thought about the homosexuals trying to take over the country. I hadn’t realized that homosexuals were trying to take over the country.

“Which homosexuals are trying to take over the country?” I asked.

” You know”  the interviewer began, ” the ones who want to take over Congress and the Senate.”  I paused for a while. ” Well, ” I said, ” I’ve never met those guys and I don’t know who they are. The only homosexuals I know are very kind people, some of whom have been beat up and spit upon and harassed and, in fact, feel threatened by the religious right.” Think about it. If you watch CNN all day and see extreme Muslims in the Middle East declaring War on America because they see us as immoral, and then you read the paper the next day to find the exact same words spoken by evangelical leaders against the cultures here in america, you’d be pretty scared.

” And what is the name of this homosexual group that is trying to take over America?” I asked him again, somewhat angry at his misuse of war rhetoric.

” Well, I hear about them all the time,” he said, rather frustrated with me.

” If you hear about them all the time, what is the name of the organization?”

” Well, I don’t know right now. But they are there.”

” Can I list for you ten or so Christian organizations who are working to try to get more Christians in the House and the Senate?” I said to the host.

” I get your point”, he said.

” But I don’t think you do. Here is my position: As a Christian, I belive Jesus wants us to reach out to people who are lost and yes-immoral, immoral just like you and I are immoral people; and declaring war against them and stirring up your listeners to the point of anger and giving them the feeling that their country, their families, and their lifestyles are being threatened is only hurting what Jesus is trying to do. This isn’t rocket science. If you declare war on somebody, you either have to kill them or handcuff them, That’s the only way to win. But if you want them to be forgiven by Christ, if you want them to live eternally in heaven with Jesus, then you have to love them. The choice is yours and my suspicion is you will be held responsible by God, a judge who will know your motives. So go ahead and declare war in the name of a conservative agenda, but don’t do it in the name of God. ”

Jesus will be nobody’s flag to wave.” I suspect that any lack of love or feelings of anger we have toward the culture around us are not feelings that come from God, but rather our souls arising again to cast rocks at the woman caught in adultery. We should not expect Christ to respond any differently to us than He did to the moralists of His day:” – Don Miller-

They dropped their stones and walked away feeling ashamed that each of them had been proven a sinner, too. And Jesus went over to comfort the woman, telling her, ” Go, and sin no more””. ( John chapter Eight)

The Lifeboat Theory

Don Miller; who happens to be one of my favorite authors, writes in his book “Searching For God Knows What” about a social theory called the Lifeboat Theory. I am not sure if he came up with it himself, but his writing concerning the issue was immensely revelatory for me. Don has written 5 wonderful books  that I  would recommend to anyone and everyone, he is the founder of the Mentoring Project and serves on President Obama’s task force on Fatherless and Healthy Families.

I am re-reading “Searching For God Knows What” as one of my summer reads, and I am catching things I couldn’t quite grasp the first time around fully, as is usual with most good books.  Chapter eight is entitled ” The Lifeboat Theory, How to Kill your Neighbor”, and opens with a memoir about being in a class in elementary school where the students were being taught a lesson in Values Clarification, or in other words, “how to be a snob”. The Lesson was as follows

” If there were a lifeboat adrift at sea, and in the lifeboat were a male lawyer, a female doctor, a crippled child, a stay-at home mom, and a garbage man, and one person had to be thrown out to save the others, which person should we choose”? ( Don Miller pg. 105)

Don recalls that they probably threw out the lawyer, but the point was that the class did not hesitate in deciding who had value and who didn’t.  The idea that all people are equal never came up.  He then  begins to question prospectively what emotions one would feel if they were in the lifeboat situation, if their fate rested in others finding value in them. There certainly would be unwavering panic, a compulsive need to have others approve of your life, and a on-going competition between people to essentially save their own lives.

” The reason I wanted to feel this is because I wondered if these emotions, the emotions you would feel in a lifeboat, were anything like the feelings we all feel when we are living out our lives, just hanging at the house or going to the grocery store”. ( Don Miller)

After he made this unmistakable parallel between the analogy and reality, I began to think of the ramifications of this dynamic within human lives. I work in food service currently, and I see this “lifeboat” drama play itself out all the time. A customer cuts in front of another in line, and boy does it just set people’s tempers off. I had a lady call and complain that her bagel wasn’t toasted dark enough and she screamed at my supervisor for fifteen minutes on the phone demanding that someone deliver a new bagel to her since she drove all the way to work  before finding her unsatisfactory bagel. I have been cut off in traffic before, and I can scarcely tell you why I want to ring the person’s neck who did it to me.

The truth is, when it happens to you, when you feel like someone is costing you something, and that there is some kind of penalty for not being important, the last thing you want to do is let it go. It can literally feel like you are going to die humiliated unless you prove yourself otherwise. All humans wrestle with this self-importance, and it can be a lot more subtle than we think. Many of us who have been able to train our actions, cannot train our hearts into not thinking that somehow we are just a little bit more educated, a little bit more spiritual, a little bit more of a good person than the average joe.  While being able to love oneself is not by any means a bad thing, the fact that we rely on other people to validate these assumptions about ourselves shows our flaw.

The human struggle to find and maintain self-importance is with us from the womb to the grave, and it is an utterly draining and vain pursuit. Pretty depressing stuff, huh? I thought so. Then Don goes on to sort of put this whole theory in a bigger perspective. If you are a social Darwinist, I will probably lose you at the next point, but maybe this is something to consider. In Genesis chapter 3, which tells the story of Adam and Eve eating of the fruit of the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil, and a tiny bit of the life they had before the fall, we see an entire paradigm shift in relationship between God and mankind.

It is to be noted that before the Fall, according to Genesis, God was in a deep, loving, relationship with Adam and Eve, as their Creator and friend. It talks of him taking walks with them, showing them around Eden, inviting them to take care of what He had made, and that he thought extremely highly of them. Essentially, Adam and Eve had a relationship with God that fueled their sense of worth and existence. They had vocation, relationship, love, without ever  having to do a thing to earn it. Also to be noted is that Adam and Eve were equal partners who did not need each other inherently to validate the other’s existence. Eve was a relational gift to Adam and the world, she is the complementary expression of God’s image, as Adam is the other half of that expression. Co-dependency did not exist at that point, as it is the use of another to fill one’s own personal need. It was all pure love, baby.

When they ate of the fruit, everything changed. The reason they did it is because they became deceived into thinking that God was withholding some great knowledge from them, and they betrayed Him. It was not a technicality, or just a misunderstanding, a change took place in their hearts as they became convinced at Satan’s words that God was holding out on them. They then put their trust in the words of an enemy. What follows is incredible. God shows up like a lover who catches his beloved in bed with another person, and what happens? They hide themselves. They realize that they aren’t wearing any clothes and they become at once insecure about their bodies, and then they try to explain everything to God by blaming everybody else but themselves. Sounds like the world as we know it.

Don explains in his book that for him, this is probably one of the most comprehensive explanations of human nature he has ever heard, and Moses wrote it. For me, I’d have to say the same. There are many theories about the existing brokenness of humanity out there. I think Psychology and Sociology are great fields in trying to cope with and understand the current problems we have, but they cannot explain the origin of pain and sin nor offer a resolution that will heal the great ache of the human soul.

Don puts it like this ” If a human being is wired so that something outside himself gives him life, and if a separation from that something would cost him his life ( physically, but also spiritually), then a human personality would seek a kind of redemption from a jury of his peers, and a lifeboat mentality would ensue across all cultures. And while  Darwinian survival mechanisms may explain some of this, these explanations cannot explain the odd complexities of our interpersonal negotiations, not to mention our tendency toward clothing. Indeed, a formulaic expression of Christian theology seems slight and irrelevant when contrasted with the holistic understandings of God’s message to humanity, a message of truth and meaning. That said, an understanding of Christianity as an identity in the lifeboat by which we compare ourselves to others is completely inappropriate. This faith is larger than the lifeboat itself, outside of it, you might say. Jesus would indicate that the greatest thing you and I can do to display we know Him is to love our brothers and sisters unconditionally, to love our neighbors as ourselves, and to love our enemies.”

A Polite Exchange

I find it funny that the people who hang out at coffee shops regularly and drag their laptops, purses, iPhones, rolling backpacks, and printers with them have this peculiar sense of whom to trust when they must go up for seconds, or use the restroom. I myself have done this because it is so much easier than trying to pack up all your shit and take it in the bathroom with you.  However, I always seem to be the one people entrust all their trappings to when they have to go number two.

“Excuse me miss”, a scruffy looking business man leans over the top of my computer and locks his baby blue eyes with mine.  “Would you be so kind as to watch my stuff for me while I use the restroom”. I glance over at the pile of his stuff on the table across from me to which he was referring, and smile back politely “sure”.

As he sighs in relief, thanks me and we have this neighborly connection going, I can’t help but think, what is it that singles me out amongst all of these other people here, to be the designated watchman? Do I have a certain look that says “I’m honest, I won’t jack your Macbook”, or do I look like I could take down someone who dared to try? I mean, I had been working out lately. What’s so funny about this to me is that I am just as much of a stranger as anybody else, and yet, I always get guard duty.

After this happened to me about five or six times, I began to catch on. It was now my turn to reap the Good Samaritan benefit. I peered over my laptop screen and did a quick survey of the folk seated around me. There was a group of high schoolers in the corner, two older ladies talking about Marjorie’s cat’s hip replacement, some hipster on his computer reading about old timey bicycles, and a middle age hippie with a newspaper, who occasionally would make a sarcastic “huh” noise to show his disagreement with what he was reading.  Who to choose? I began to bite my nails trying to figure out who to approach. Finally, as I could no longer stand the feeling of my venti latte in my bladder, I walked over to the old beatnik. “Excuse me sir”, I stammered.

He folded down his newspaper and before he could ask me what I wanted I interjected “could you please watch my stuff while I go to the bathroom”.

“Yeah no problem”, he said hoarsely, coughed and went back to his reading. Well, look at that, I thought to myself. I went to the bathroom, hoping my stuff would be there when I got back. I returned to find him still engrossed in his newspaper and my stuff exactly as I left it. How did I know how to pick the right person to watch my stuff? I haven’t the slightest. I’d like to believe there are still some honest folk in the world who are willing to watch out for their neighbor at no cost. There really isn’t a way to figure out a person just by looking at them, but I think basic trust in our fellow humans is still alive. It’s just as important to be one that others can trust as to be willing to lend your trust to others, and hopefully, you’ll always have someone to watch your stuff when you have to pee really bad at Starbucks.